I'm Baaaaack (well, 87% back)

Well, my dear friends. My colleagues and I have returned from China, bringing with us our newly acquired slew of parasites and ailments.

Actually, I have been back for over a week, but it has been a weak week. Until now, the only possible blog post for me would have looked something along the lines of:

I R Sick (followed by accounts of my doctor-visiting adventures).

or

Water. Water. Bring Water.

Anyway, I'd say I'm back up to 87%. I have regained my appetite and shake like a Chihuahua every time I eat (I lost a million lbs, totally messing with my Shape-Ups experiment - Don't worry, I plan to gain them back asap in the form of milkshakes. MMmmmmmmm milkshakes).

So On With The Show

This is not China-related, but it was the moment where I realized I was well enough to rejoin the ranks of humans (or whatever ranks I used to be in):

My friend had a party (I told her I wouldn't blog about it (I only blog about parties where I fail to socialize) - I'm blogging anyway).

So. My friend had a party. She lives with her fiance and a new(er) roomate.

We were outside eating watermelon (ok. I was eating all the watermelon. Chihuahua-style) and I noticed a cute little garden in the yard. My friend's fiance is european and an awesome cook, thus I assumed it was his garden.

He's also a little straight laced.

I caught the eye of the new(er) roommate, brought my finger to my lips, whispered, "Shhhhhh," and tossed my watermelon rind in the garden.

She returned the, "Shhhhh," and smiled.

Later that night, I found out it was, in fact, her garden I was tossing watermelon rinds in (yes, rinds. I'm a jerk).

I left early (recuperating people need their rest), but not before ensuring the fire pit and the roof of the neighbor's shed were equally graced with watermelon rinds.

That's right, my friends. It is time to return to writing. The creativity is beginning to flow in a not-so-savory direction.

Do you find yourselves becoming inadvertently (or destructively) creative if you spend too much time away from your creative outlet of choice?

Weebles wobble but they don't fall down

I've gone and done it. I went and bought a pair of Sketchers Shape-ups. I am officially tromping around like a woman with two rocking horses strapped to her feet. Incredibly comfortable rocking horses.

Research (interwebs and other)

From what I had come across, these shoes are designed to strengthen core, legs, improve posture and balance, reduce gingivitis, paint your house, wash your car and give you the poise and stamina to run a 10K marathon in heels. Well, not exactly but they are getting a lot of hype in the circles I run in (ran in: now I walk. No running in the Shape-ups).

I really wasn't sure what they would be like. There are very few testimonials online about them aside from promotional material and statements such as, "They are supposed to (yadda yadda yadda)," and, "I hear they (yadda yadda yadda)."

The best testimonial I got was from the woman (and her husband, who was also trying on a pair) in the shoe store who whispered to me, "My girlfriend wore them for two months and the cellulite on her butt..." She then slashed at her throat like the cellulite had been decapitated. Message sent. These shoes mean business.

Why bother?

Now, this is a blog (thank you Captain Obvious), thus I am more or less invisible, so I am going to level with you. I don't really care about what my butt looks like (its not like I can see it). I'm not that interested in what my weight is, or the number value assigned to my waistline. What I can't stand is my muffin-top. Esther.

My line of thought: better posture = Esther might have to work a little harder. A fabulous looking butt is just a bonus.

So anyway, this may fall under the category of one of those blog post no-nos. No TMI blog posts! Regardless, I plan on filing it under product testing and quality control, rather than TMI.

My gift to you:

If you see Sketchers Shape-ups in an upcoming blog post heading and don't want to read about it, you can consider yourself warned.

If you want to know if the darn things work (I know I do) ... Stay tuned.